a different kind of person.

April 30, 2013

 photo photolizard02.jpg  photo photolizard01.jpg




  One night I was up late, talking to Chris.

"When I think about some things in our life... I wish I was different...."

He pressed me, asked me what I meant, had me make a list.

I woke up the next morning and thought. enough. 
I am tired of thinking about those things. 
I am just going to be intentional and do them.

and I did.

I wanted to have the tv off. even if it was just on for noise. I wanted pretty music on instead.
I wanted family dinners every single night. around the table. meal planned. prayers said. conversations had.
I wanted a bedtime routine. 
I wanted to pull Ainsleigh's naps so that she went to bed at a reasonable hour. and with that a whole evening with Chris.
I wanted to do an hour of school in the mornings with the kids.
and I wanted to start running. 
I wanted to be more intentional with my relationship with Chris.
and I wanted to change some icky parts of my soul that I convinced myself didn't exist. 

I didn't do all at once. But slowly now I have done every one on that list. Some are still a work in progress. A few are very much still a work in progress.

The running was just this past week.
I am a terrible runner. I can walk a few blocks then just want to walk normally. But this week I have loved it. I listened to my feet hit the pavement, took pictures of flowers along the way, had music playing, let the sunshine hit my nose. I closed my eyes and forgot about every stress in the world for those 30 minutes. It was glorious.

The reason that I wanted to share this is because I have this feeling that so many of us buy into the lies. I would end some of my days feeling like a failure. All the " I wish...." . 
Then the lie brings sadness and something about the sadness keeps us there. 
In the lies. 
So I guess this is a challenge, an encouragement- whether your "list" is small and silly things like mine or a heavy list....maybe even an addiction or a secret you've been a slave to for far too long. 
Wake up tomorrow and say enough. Today I start the journey to change. 

I stood at the sink tonight washing the dishes. I had priscilla ahn humming next to me. We had just had a lovely family meal and I was slowly letting the bubbles slide down the plates. The kids were content and peaceful and I couldn't help but give thanks. 

Do you have something weighing you down?
shall we say enough?

68 comments:

  1. i feel like i have something weighing me down everyday...but I have really tired to let it go & just enjoy life. Thank you for this beautiful post. xoxo Kelly

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  2. i'm a new reader to your blog and am so glad i have found it. this really spoke to me and i will be borrowing your idea and making a list of my own. thanks so much for your wise, insightful words :)

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  3. This is so good. My "list" is almost identical, and now I'm motivated, so thank you! : ) My excuse is always that I'm "too busy," but I need to think about what I'm going to remember in 10 years. The family dinners, or the extra work that I got done during that 20 minutes...

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  4. Love this.... sometimes its tough to say "enough" when you have a busy life and little ones as well. sometimes creating routines is challenging at first, but the children seem to do so much better and everything goes more smoothly....allowing us moms to have a little more time to breathe and catch up on things we have pushed aside that we long to do. <3

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  5. enough is totally enough! Thanks Casey :) Ready to actually work on all these goals I'm making!

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  6. Love this! Thank you for the reminder. I feel like I read blogs and think about how perfect and put together everyone else lives are but the truth is, we all have "things" we can work on. Love when people are real.

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  7. Gorgeous. As usual. Unique and thought provoking this is why I love you. :) Thanks for the challenge.

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  8. You are always so inspiring. Now that I've graduated, I have a looooooong list of "wishes" ...mostly silly... but still, enough! Thanks for the inspiration, babe!

    -Chelsea
    chelsandthecity.blogspot.com

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  9. This is a lovely post. I often imagine (even today I did this) of the perfect me. And you know what? I can do it. I just gives me a goal to strive towards. What would the perfect 'me woman' do? Would she shout at her kids? Would she waste hours on the computer doing nothing? Would she eat those unhealthy things? No. So then I try to do what she does. It's not impossible. You're right, those are lies. We CAN do it. And it is good.

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  10. Love the way you put everything on here. I have been going through the same things - just wanting things to be different, listing them out, and trying to be intentional - and am so encouraged that I'm not the only one :)

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  11. Thank you. I can't put into words how this made me feel. All I can say is, I needed this. This was a blessing. Thank you.

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  12. I've loved all your posts recently and it's reminding me to live more intentionally. :) Thanks for the push. :)

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  13. Love this. It can be hard to get out of a rut. we have all been there, and many times it's a constant effort to stay on top of it. Wonderful post sweet mama <3

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  15. such a moving post, casey. ;)

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  16. This was great to read! I, too, have my own list. I'm sure we all do. But I like what you said about just doing it. That's when I get caught up -- when I spend way way (WAY) too much time thinking about things and nowhere near enough time just doing it. Perhaps I'll be more intentional and make my own list. Which would be a double plus because being more intentional would be on my list!

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  17. Then the lie brings sadness and something about the sadness keeps us there.
    Wow. Yes.

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  18. Wow. Beautiful. And yes. Enough. Enough to the lies in my head. Enough to feeling like I am not "enough" in certain aspects of my life. Thank you.

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  19. Thank you for sharing. Such inspiring words!

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  20. I'm always saying, "We should do this or that..." I just recently started working off a checklist and trying to be more intentional to live the kind of life I want. It's a slow process, but I like the way it's working.

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  21. First of all, that picture of Aiden. Love. :) He's such a darling boy. Second of all, thanks for speaking right to my heart. I always have these ideas of how I want the day to go, of how I want our lives to be, but sometimes I don't act on them. I want to make a list. It may be a lot like yours (minus the running -- love walking), but really stick to it this time. What a blessing you are, Casey. I wish that we could be real life friends. :)

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  22. This post just inspired me in ways I haven't felt inspired in months. This is a process of change that needs to happen in my life as well, and it's going to start now. I love that you shared this.

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  23. wow, this is exactly what I was thinking about today. The fact that I have made so many list of the things I wish I did (or did better) but all I really need to do is start one thing at a time... thanks again for a perfectly timed post :)

    Kendra @ openspaces

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  24. yes! yes! so good.
    love your words. xoxo

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  25. I decided I wanted my family to eat meals at the table. With napkins, a water jug, music softly in the background and conversation and to be more intentional about making nicer meals. Not flash but a bit more special and thought out than I had been.

    I have weeks where I fail a bit but other times we really enjoy those meal times. This week has been a bit fail in that department. We ate tea in the living room the last two nights. Must change that.

    I also really want the television on less.
    I hate how much a part of my kids days it is. They are older than your babies but they just automatically get up and pop the tv on. They get home from school and pop the tv on. I wish it wasn't the automatic entertainment. When I make them turn it off they find so many interesting things to do. I need to turn it off more.

    My big goal has been to make my home more open to their creativity.
    I try and give them spaces to create. Craft supplies of their own. Lots of inspiring books to read or get ideas from. Lots of music is played. And the big one I try and be sure to create around them so they follow my lead.

    I have a long way to go but we are getting there.

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  26. Yes! Stop wishing, start doing. Today.

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  27. Thank you so much for this, Casey. I'm making a list tonight, and putting them into action starting tomorrow. Whether it be a few at a time, or just one at a time. Thank you.

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  28. Beautiful as always, Casey. I am so happy of you that you are accomplishing the things you set out change. I hope that one day, we can all do the same :)

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  29. YES! I LOVE this!!!! I cut the TV off almost a month ago.....I just cant take all the bad news in the world. This is so inspiring and I think these same thoughts too. Thank you for sharing. Love the song too!

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  30. You are such a beautiful person and amazing role model to all women and mothers!

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  31. Long time reader ... first time poster. Great post ... thanks so much for sharing your thoughts. Just before reading this I was asking God to help me let go of something ... change the situation and change ME. With His help, I am really going to try to say "enough" ... and then believe it! (PS My baby girl is floralandfrayed.com!)

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  32. So true Casey! we can totally get stuck in a rut and listen to the lies of the enemy, of course thats right were he wants us and he wants to keep us there.... It just takes one step in the right direction doesn't it? Live with intention.. like its our last. :)

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  33. Thank you for inspiring me today! I do have a list, a rather long one. I am going to write it down tonight with the intent to conquer it with His help.
    Thank you.

    -Aeron

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  34. Couldn't agree more. Seems I feel this way every.single.day.
    I know the enemy lies to use to keep us distracted from the purpose that God has for us. Once we are distracted I believe he lies to us even more to keep our hearts weighed down with the heaviness of never quite measuring up.

    Thank you so much for sharing this.

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  35. i love all of the things on your list. i have grown to absolutely LOVE not having the tv on very often. (although right now with NBA playoffs, it's a bit hard to pull husband away when he's home and able to watch... ;))

    ...with intention. that should be added to every aspect in our lives! thank you for sharing!

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  36. Just what I needed. I have been feeling the same way, and struggling with a few things on my list - such as waking up early enough to run / / time to myself. Thanks for the inspiration.

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  37. this totally inspired me to take the step to make those changes i want to make in my life. i have no idea why i even put it off but...thank you :)

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  38. This is so great for me to read today. I have made of a list of these things, almost the same as yours! I just haven't actually done them yet. I loved reading the comments and seeing that so many other people think these things too!

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  39. I think we all struggle with this sort of thing from time to time. It's nice having husbands who hear us out and help us through it =)

    - Sarah
    A Girl In Transit

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  40. YOU ARE SO RIGHT!!! we let that little voice in our heads get louder and louder and let it make us think less of ourselves! if we want to change it, lets change it!!!! except for the running thing- ive tried since last summer to run and i just really stink at it- but i want to rock at it!!! lol i have no endurance!!

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  41. Perfect post. Such an idyllic list and the realization that it needed to be made, and that those things would need to be changed deliberately- yet slowly- is spot-on. Off to create my own list.

    xoxo,
    Kate (www.stylesmaller.com)

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  42. This post is great, you are the best. So many moms have been blogging about similar feelings this week and it's so comforting to know we all have times where we feel this way! thank you for sharing!

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  43. Oh Casey, I definitely have a list. And you're right, it is time to say enough. Thank you for this post sweet friend!

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  44. YES!!!! This is amazing! I decided just last night that I was going to wake up and work out this morning because it makes my day run so much smoother. And I did it! Thank you for the encouragement!

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  45. what a beautiful post and great list!!

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  46. Being intentional about the relationships in our lives is such a large but important message. So many things come effortlessly with the people we love, but if we take just a bit of time to be more thoughtful the results are immeasurable.

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  47. This post definitely hits home for me as I go to bed almost every night with the "I wish" thoughts. I wish I would just eat healthier, I wish I could lose the 35 lbs I've gained, I wish I could be a better girlfriend, I wish I had my dream job. All these wishes but I'm not doing anything to change them into realities. It's really hard to become the person you wish you could be but I'm on my journey to get there!

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  48. SO beautifully said Case! Im such a slave to certain things and I need to stand up and leave them behind. ADORE you!

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  49. What a great inspiring post!!! Loved it. Thank you

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  50. So good! God is speaking through you! :)

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  51. So good! God is speaking through you! :)

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  52. Thank you for this. You inspired this post:

    http://beautifulfamilyaffairs.blogspot.com/2013/05/intentional-living.html

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  53. love this. i was just reading yesterday in 1 peter 5 about how satan in like roaring lion waiting to attack his prey. with no mercy. often our minds are his next meal. we are also called to battle and fight that not sit aside.

    such a great post about putting into actin those lies we sometimes but into. :)

    and last but not least. taking away naps. lol. so hard. but earlier bedtimes are always nice ;)

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  54. Wow. Yes I have a huge weight weighing me down. A huge entirely too big one for me to carry on my own. Will be blogging about it today. Please come check it out when you get a sec, http://www.marvelouscara.com

    Thank you for your beautiful openness, Casey. xoxo

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  55. I love this post. So inspirational. Thank you. And you're right--a lot of times, it's just actually DOING it. It's so easy to get stuck and stay stuck b/c it's comfortable even if you don't particularly like it. Breaking free.... it's wonderful, isn't it? :)

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  56. Obsessed with your pictures. What kind of device do you use to take them?

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    1. thank you!! I use a canon 5d mark ii and photoshop!

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  57. FPFG sent me over and I'm so glad she did. Thank you. You spoke the words my heart's been searching for.

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  58. Casey- I really love Priscilla Ahn, do you have any other suggestions for setting the "mood" at home? My daughter loves to paint and draw. I get super stressed at dinner time "witching hour"....it seems like she needs me, the dogs need to be walked, my husband is walking through the door, and I'm usually exhausted and don't care what we have for dinner. I'm trying to make preparing dinner more intentional and relaxing. Sometimes music can just be too much noise for me. I would love any suggestions you have- for calming the hectic evening time and while the little one is painting. XOXO

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    1. hey love! is there anything that she loves to do that calms her? I set up stuff for them to do at the table while I am coking...like a game or a coloring book. And for art time: candles, twinkle lights, music!!!! I love putting on worship music or artists like jack johnson, priscilla ahn, john mayer!!!

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    2. You are such a sweetheart, thank you Casey! Xo

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    3. You are such a sweetheart! Thank you Casey!! Xo

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