So, I love things to be clean. I first noticed my hand gripped on this need to control and keep things in order when I began teaching art at a school right out of college. Being an art teacher for kids age 3- 5th grade will change you...or begin to anyway. Somewhere between the spilling water and cut paper pieces everywhere I saw myself beginning to loosen. The kids would enter the room, twinkle lights flickering and soft music playing.... I would attempt to set the tone for the day but as it goes with all children and kids in a good environment to create you have to balance a bit.
Then before Aiden was born, when we first opened A Little Artsy, I was teaching from 8am-7pm and running the artsy parties on the weekends (even Sundays). Oh and Art Parties will take your need to control and keep things clean to a whole new level by the way. I think it might have been the day we had a child attempt to flush his shoe down the toilet during one of the parties and completely flood our studio that all of what was left just rode the wave straight out the door.
We laughed. I changed a lot, and now 8 years later as a mama I am forever grateful for that season. I want my kids to create. I want them to cut and glue and paint and draw. I want them to feed themselves no matter how messy and I want them to feel free to explore their creativity.
Chris and I often talk about creating art. His art comes through film, a lens, telling a story. Beauty can come in so many different ways but it's so important. And I want our kids to appreciate and see beauty...I want them to have the freedom to create it.
I haven't painted in months. Something that has been a passion, a beautiful outlet, a story for me for so long has slowly drifted. I know it is this season... I know that someday my office will be filled with the sweet smell of fresh oil paint and I will have my emotions spilled back out onto a canvas just like it was in my yesterdays. Dreams don't have to die, passions don't have to end...they can just pause for a bit. Or even change. Photography today is my painting yesterday.
Creating with them is my new today.
But all the same.... creating is a beautiful thing. A gift to the world and a gift to yourself.
I hope my babies always hold on to that.