First child. First Kindergarten.

August 15, 2014

You my baby boy have given me 5 years of firsts.

With you, in some ways, I will always be a first time mama. I've experienced it all with you. The first moments of motherhood that gripped my soul and forever changed me. The soul searching, the finding myself. You have had my heart from the first second. It's always been yours sweet Aiden.

I can still close my eyes and take myself back to holding a curled up newborn Aiden, all nuzzled against my neck. The smell of milk and baby breath close by. Teeny fingers tangled in my hair and a the warm feeling of him slumped on my chest. 

I have experienced 5 years of a battle with open hands. A war that wages my mama soul. Desperately wanting to hold you tight yet learning to slowly loosen the grip and watch you soar. I dance with the questions, have I soaked it in enough? Have I loved you the biggest and boldest way possible? Have I taught you everything you need to know as I watch you walk through those Kindergarten doors?

When you were first born I would rock you and sing to you in the night and cry thinking about this day. I knew my heart would be gripped tight and with a lump in my throat I would watch the back of your blonde curls turn towards the classroom, my fingers slowly ungrasping the hold.

Be creative.
Love well.
Be yourself.
Look out for others.

Up until this moment you have been at home learning from us. With us. We've skipped bedtimes, we've snuggled, read books, we have made muffins and caught snakes. We have made forts out of blankets, talked about everything under the sun and loved big.

Next week you go.
Next week I watch my first born, baby boy soar.
I love you A.

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  1. I can't even...this is too much. My oldest is only almost two and already I can tell that time is zooming by too fast! Great job letting your babies fly, love. He will do amazing because you taught him to be. <3

  2. I love that picture of him sleeping next to you. They grow too fast!!

  3. It does get easier, sending your kids off to kinder or school! I have four and I love watching them go out into the world to learn new things. It's very exciting. Good luck!

  4. Your post was really touching to read. Good luck on your first day of school Aiden!

  5. On one hand I am dreading this day, yet at the same time I am so very curious to know what my baby will be like when he is 5! xx Such a beautiful post

  6. Beautiful pictures of memories! Two two kiddos are in 1st and 2nd..they grow so fast!

  7. He looks so much like his daddy! My son started school last September and it was so hard to let go! Good luck to Aiden on his new adventure x

  8. Time flies when you have the cutest babes on the planet!

  9. I just sent my first-born and son off to kindergarten too. Girl...I am right there with you! Just like you said, everything with him is a "first" and we're always learning and trying to figure it out with each new phase he goes through. It's exciting and terrifying all at once. Goodluck to Aiden!

  10. My last baby ~ my last "first day of kindergarten" is Monday. The first baby was hard. This last baby is even harder. ♥

  11. Stay strong mama...he will love it and grow so muc this year! I just sent my second off to kindergarten and I had just as sappy as a time as I did with my oldest. Hugs. :)

  12. It was wonderful to meet you at The Hundred in Dallas! Thank you for humbly sharing your wisdom and experience. xoxo

  13. There is no questioning that you are your happiest when you are with your children. You have this untouchable glow to you when photographed with your kiddos. It is so very beautiful to see! God bless, Casey!

  14. Beautiful, beautiful write up, Casey; you have me in tears over here. What exciting times you all have ahead of you, with your firstborn starting kindergarten. :)

    1. aw I sure love you, youre such a sweetheart always friend!

  15. ooh so sweet , I think you are an incredible mama, an inspiration for me, your kids are amazing :)
    love from Spain Casey