time management, help!

April 12, 2011


My cute friend Gussy posted
this today about time management. This is something I really struggle with. I over.commit, try to please everyone, get completely overwhelmed.

The truth is deep in my heart I am a bit of a loner. Not a fan of texting, not a fan of talking on the phone. Pre-Aiden days was a bit of a hermit. 

After I had Aiden I really opened myself up to friendships and that has blessed me immensely.

Lately I cannot balance art classes at my home, artsy classes & parties, commissions, friends, marriage, two kids and so many emails. It's silly...the other day I told chris I was drowning.

"you are NOT drowning"

I know there are much bigger fish to fry. Long story short....I already committed to no playdates for a short time until I get a little more caught up and as of today I have set up auto response emails. 
Soooo...taking steps in the right direction I hope.

Any advice on balancing it all?

People watching my kids is not the answer, they come first no matter what. 

It's balancing everything else....keeping everyone happy.



  1. Oh, girl, I struggle with the same dang thing. One thing I am learning is to do the things I HAVE to do first. If I don't already have a blog post scheduled it waits until breakfast is done, the laundry is washing, the kitchen is cleaned after breakfast, dinner is accounted for, and so forth. I find I get distratced easily and can sit at the comp reading God knows how many blogs while the clock ticks on by. I do the things I need to do first, then do the things I want to do. Beyond that, please post your tips!

  2. aw, i like the new header! it's so simple and understated.

    unfortunately, i have no advice for you. this is BY FAR my biggest struggle, too. so, the good news is you're not alone, but i know that doesn't really help... i'll be interested to hear what advice other people have for you, b/c i need it too!

    PS i MUCH prefer being alone, too. i have to force myself to text, return phone calls and emails, and actually get out of the house to hang out with people. so far it's been such a blessing, actually putting myself out there, but it's still hard work for me.


  3. You have to take in to consideration that the people that are worth pleasing will know that by giving you time, it is pleasing you. ...that probably only makes sense in my head. But know the people that you don't have time to hang out with at the moment will understand that by not spending time with you that you're able to spend time with your children and take care of things that can take care of your family.

    ....I think I just made that whole statement even more confusing, but just know that I LOVE you!!! hahahaha

  4. No advice, but know you aren't alone. I struggle with balance too!

  5. I TOTALLY DO THIS! and people telling me "since you have a business, why don't you just get a sitter, or put your kids in daycare" drives me insane. Surely if God has this planned for me, his desires for my children are still a part of the plan. I end up spending all of nap time and post bed time hours working on "work" and neglecting the house,laundry,dishes. I notice it makes me irritable, but I read something recently about "A disciplined use of Time" and it really opened my eyes. I haven't watched ANY TV in a week, and I feel like I have about a million more hours in the day. Then I've decided that I have to do everything else in sort of "time slots" like I've found 20-30 solid minutes of play,reading,loving gets me about an hour of working time where they "can" get my attention, but they will usually play together for a while and then come back for their dose of mommy.

    here's to all of the other multi-engaged mommas out there. Hey...we only live once right?


  6. I feel ya Casey! I do the same. exact. thing.

    I'm trying to learn how to say no. For me, that's the first step. I'm always saying yes and trying to people please.

    What helps me in making decisions about whether or not I should commit to something is by using the 5 "____" rule. Think of how both options would affect you in 5 days, 5 weeks, 5 months, and then 5 years. I always do that when I can't make up my mind. It can really give good perspective.

  7. I get overwhelmed easily, and something that works for my three littles and me is just not going anywhere. Not getting in the car. Sure, we take walks, read outside, have a picnic, take care of the chickens, draw, the boys ride their bikes, (today we made jam!), but we don't get in the car. We don't do errands, we don't do playdates. Doing that a handful of days per week, or all of them, really keeps me centered.

  8. wait just one second. look at your last sentence. i'm wondering when you were assigned the job of keeping everyone happy?? it is an impossibility. you answer to ONE person (i know you know, too) and that guy has a daily agenda for you that is perfect and pleasing and suitable for fitting into your 14 or so hours. the biggest lesson to learn is how to discipline yourself to listen and follow his to-do list. i don't every day. i wish i did. but i find when i regularly check in with the Lord, asking what HIS agenda for me entails - i'm literally meaning asking about very ordinary tasks that all together threaten to drown me - somehow He points me in the right direction and i end the day with AT LEAST the satisfaction that i was faithful. Focus on Him, and He'll help you see and meet all the real needs around you, including your own. one day at a time. your blog looks GREAT by the way!!

  9. sorry, one more thing to say. i know, this is already a short novel! after striving for it for years, I've decided the goal of finding "balance" is an illusion, and just one more way we try to measure our success (or more accurately, our failure). really, it just distracts me from looking to God to tell me how i'm doing. I want His evaluation of how I spend my time to be the only one I care about. seasons change, and the focus of our energies ebb and flow from one thing to the next as needed. just listen to Jesus, sweet pea, and don't worry about reaching this perfect place of equilibrium 'cause you never will, and that's okay.

  10. Aahh, the 'motherload'! How we all relate...
    I was once told (and I blogged about it, wish I had the time to send you the link!) that there is no balance. That I could take that verse literally: Seek first His kingdom and ALL THESE THINGS WILL BE ADDED. Like, no striving, no stress, God first, and this will ensure everything else is 'added' (ie time to do everything!)
    Since then, even if I don't accomplish every single task I set out to do in a day, I can rest in the fact that I put my God first, and He is pleased.

    Not too practical on the 'help' side of things though, hehe, sorry :)


  11. Here is my only time management advice. Ask the Lord. Ask Him to show you like Mary & Martha - what is the better thing? What should your hands be diligently working on and ask Him to help you accomplish it to His glory. Simple, obvious step but so helpful.

  12. I love Jessi's advice. Now having 4 kids I've realized that every day will look different and bring different limitations. I strive to glorify God above all else and prayerfully consider anything I am spending my time on. I've noticed that if I've taken on too much or committed to something for the wrong reasons God reveals it to me in time and then I can adjust. Being a wife, mommy & friend is a hard yet rewarding job and you are not alone. Remember, if God is for you , who can be against you? Love your blog, your family is precious!

  13. Sweet friend! I have SUCH a hard time saying no. . . AND sometimes I feel like I am drowning too. . . I REALLY try to get in bed at a certain time. . . but sometime life gets in the way. . . let me know when you have this figured out! :-)

  14. Casey, I have this problem too...I've been trying to ask God to orchestrate my days each morning as I make Noah breakfast or sit with him watching sesame street or whatever other motherly thing I'm doing. It seems like those days go more smoothly, I remarkably have extra pockets of time throughout the day, and I feel more peace and energy while I mother, cook, clean, blog, etc...If only I asked Him every day. There is so much more grace for us than we will ever understand. Don't be too hard on yourself! Your family knows your deep love for them just by being who you are in the midst of the madness!

  15. Oh man, when you find a good answer please pass it along to me.. I have 3 kids and this morning woke up feeling so overwhelmed... but His Grace is sufficient even when we feel like we are drowning..